Looking Past the Past

Posted on Tue Jun 23rd, 2020 @ 1:20am by Lieutenant Kalin Brennan-Griffin PhD & Sasha Vieers (Deceased)
Edited on on Fri Jul 10th, 2020 @ 5:23pm

Mission: Death in Paradise
Location: Deck 7 - Sciences

A Mission Post by Ensign Sasha Vieers & Lieutenant Kalin 'Shae' Brennan-Griffin PhD
Mission: Death in Paradise
Location: Deck 7 - Sciences
Timeline:
Wed Nov 28th, 2018 @ 5:03am

ON:

Sasha Vieers was in a fairly good mood today. She had completed her first watch on the Bridge as an Operations Officer, met the rest of the team and became acquainted with them quite quickly, and even made a date with a fine fellow from Engineering. She was beginning to feel like the stresses and dramas of their previous time in the Bubble were fading away and she was getting back to 'normal'. Of course, she knew that had not been invited to join the Diplomatic party to Paradise Station, despite her extensive knowledge of alien languages, because the Captain and senior crew still did not trust her - and this continued to cast a shadow over her day.

In an effort to heal wounds opened by the bubble, during a break from Bridge watch Sasha travelled down to Deck 7 to see if she could speak with Lieutenant Brennan, in the hopes that her former boss would be receptive to an informal meeting.

Shae was in Astrometrics analyzing some sensor data from the Indigo Sky. A report had already been drawn up by one of her subordinates for the Captain, but Shae knew there was more that could be gleaned from these readings, not to mention that she was determined to better understand what had happened to them. Hearing the door to Astrometrics open and shut, Shae causally glanced back to see who had visited the lab today, frowning when she recognized the familiar silhouette of Sasha Vieers in the dark.

"Any word from the Away Team?" Shae asked. Her tone was pleasant enough, but there was a strained tension under it all that betrayed her dislike of the former linguist, and the question itself had a formality to dismiss the pleasantries of the small talk in which she was often fond of engaging.

"Arrived successfully and made contact with the station chief." Sasha replied, trying not to let the formality of Brennan's approach dissuade her, "But I don't think the rest of the people waiting to dock at Paradise appreciated us going ahead of them."

"As long as the mission is progressing safely, that's all that matters," Shae replied, blatantly ignoring Sasha's attempts to spark conversation by returning her attention to the sensor readings on the large holo-screen. "Was there anything else on which I needed to be updated?" she then asked.

"Nothing mission-related, no." Sasha replied. She idled by the doorway, trying to hide her discomfort by playing with a few tri-corders. One was not charging properly so she reset the battery plate and re-installed it into the base. "I heard we were still making discoveries about the Indigo Sky, though?" She inquired as she fiddled.

With a sigh, Shae removed her reading glasses, then turned and walked towards Sasha. "You must have something you wish to say if you're forcing us through this horrid attempt at conversation, so whatever thoughts you're chewing on, just spit it out already," Shae said as she crossed her arms over her chest.

Sasha stepped forward, putting her hands together as if to plead with the senior officer. "Please, Shae, I hate how angry you are with me still. I need to you know how wrong it was for me to follow Dorian in the Bubble. I am deeply sorry for that. But I also need you to know how he manipulated me into following him. I thought I was reaching him, but really he was just using me."

Shae growled at Sasha, but reeled in her response before she could bare her fangs at the woman. "I've been having a hard time dealing with my feelings regarding that man," she confessed in a stern tone. "On the one hand, I was right, his escape did cause the collapse of the Bubble, and he did take our only working pod, leaving us in hell with no means of trying to escape as well. On the other hand, it was what was needed to get us out of there in the end; his theory was pure conjecture, but somehow he saw something we couldn't, something that transcended the evidence available to us, so I'm torn between loathing and gratitude. But you... All I can muster is pity. You sided with a man who murdered the Captain in cold blood, and I pleaded with you, I gave you a chance to chose the side of reason, and you have the audacity to be surprised that he not only manipulated you but then turned on you and left you for dead." Then with a scoff, Shae continued in an icy tone, "Even still, there's no need for apologies, because it didn't really happen so no one is being held accountable for their actions." A mockery if ever there was one of the words she'd been hearing over and over since she'd woken from the Bubble.

Sasha was stunned by Brennan's words, and she stammered for a moment to find a suitable response. "You should loath him! Even if others say it didn't happen, it still feels like it did. I still remember how he spent thirty years filling my mind with his lies and machinations. Everything he did, he intended to do so, and that man is still walking around this ship! I will take your pity, Lieutenant, but please believe me that I am awake now to Rochester and how dangerous he is."

"I don't recall asking for your validation to hate him," Shae replied stiffly. "And for what it's worth, I do believe you, but that doesn't mean I have to like you. I know you thought you were doing a good thing by reach out to him; you thought you were helping him to move in a positive direction, and that is admirable, but when his true nature was revealed you made the wrong choice and now the trust is broken. So it's just as well that the Captain made the choice to move you to Operations, because I would have submitted a request to transfer you out of my department once I was well enough to do so."

Vieers gave a frustrated sigh, wringing her hands together, "I'm willing to do whatever I can to rebuild the trust with you, Lieutenant Brennan. I know it's been broken but I am here, asking what I can do to, anything I can do, to start repairing the damage?"

"There's nothing you can do," Shae finally relented with a sigh. "There are some things once broken cannot be fixed. If it helps ease your mind any, I don't hate you; you suffered enough along side the rest of us as the Bubble collapsed, so you've at least earned a reprieve from my hate, but if you're truly sincere about re-earning my trust, then you need to let time work its magic, because at this point time is the only thing that could heal this rift." It probably wasn't the answer Sasha had hoped to hear, but at least it wasn't a hard denial of her attempt to mend this bridge.

Sasha bit her lip, trying not to argue back. She had to take what was being offered, as little as it were. "Okay, I will respect that. I hope one day we'll be able to at least be friends." She took a breath before shaking her head. "And believe me, I won't be fooled by Dorian Rochester any more."

At this, Shae's expression softened; despite her own feelings of betrayal, Shae could see quite clearly that Vieers had been hurt badly by Rochester. "I won't pretend to understand the feelings you may have had for him, but I can sympathize with how hard this all must be for you; but right now, everything is still fairly fresh in our minds, emotions are going to be running hot for some time. Be patient, it won't be like this forever," she said to try to offer some encouragement to the junior Officer. It wasn't trust, or friendship for that matter, but what Shae was offering now was a start.

"I hope not." Sasha replied, trying to remain hopeful. She had been through a lot of emotions lately and the thought of it continuing into the foreseeable future was almost too much to bear. She knew some wanted to move on, and some needed more time. She just didn't want to be looked at with distrust anymore. Every time she had to have this conversation, she began to hate Dorian all over again, "I can't wait until he's offloaded on Carnwennan Station. Though that doesn't mean we'll be rid of him for good."

"No, I imagine we'll be dealing with the consequences of his actions for some time yet," Shae replied with a sigh. "Anyway, it must be time for you to be getting back to the Bridge; if you've overstayed whatever break you took, just say I called you for a linguisitcs consult, that should excuse any tardiness," she offered.

"Yes, thank you." Sasha nodded politely. The Ensign turned to leave before stopping and looking back. She wanted to say something else, unsure of whether Lieutenant Brennan would react well to it. They had ended the conversation on a graceful note, even bordering on cordial, and she didn't want to ruin that. Instead she chose to leave the office and return to her work station, hopeful at least that they had made the first steps towards rebuilding the damage Dorian had done.

As Sasha left, Shae replaced the thin-rimmed frames to her face then returned to her station to continue working. She was aware that she had likely been harsher than she needed to be with the young woman, but as she mentioned earlier, emotions were running hot and she was no exception to this, so much so that it had been impossible to turn those feelings off to accept Sasha's heartfelt apology. But time truly was the great healer, and as Shae resumed her analysis she consoled herself with the fact that she had been able to impart to the girl a measure of hope for reconciliation.

OFF