Mindo's Game, Part 1

Posted on Tue Dec 17th, 2024 @ 2:48pm by Lieutenant Commander Caradan Eunidas & Commander Mindo

Mission: The Only Thing Left Was Hope
Location: Kip's Diner
Timeline: current

ON

The hustle and bustle at Kip's Diner was just as busy during brunch hour as it had been those many times "Cadet" Mindo visited the place back in his Academy days. Sitting in a booth toward the back, Mindo didn't bother glancing at the menu. He knew he'd get the same thing he always got there... Texas-size Sourdough French Toast, with a side of "country style, smothered, and chunked" hashbrowns, meaning they were covered with their signature country gravy, smothered in cheese with chunks of diced ham. Along with a hot cup of coffee and a cold glass of orange juice, the meal took up all the space in his tiny stomach and kept him full for the whole day. It was also his rebellion from the horridly replicated food the Academy cafeteria provided. Mindo's order was proof that big obstacles could be overcome by the smallest of people (with big appetites).

He hadn't ordered yet, except for the coffee and orange juice. He'd gotten there a little early and was waiting for someone he hadn't seen in a very long time. Mindo was nervous. It had been a while since he'd seen Anastasia Lauda. She had been his therapist at the Academy. He'd nearly been expelled after a series of "irresponsible incidents." While he had poor conduct reports, his grades told another story. He was allowed to stay, provided he see a therapist every week for psych evaluation. After a few sessions with Anastasia doing word games and psych tests and the like, the two started having their sessions under the covers of the fold-out couch in her office. And, as if Mindo's incidents nearly getting him expelled was not enough, their undercover sessions nearly got her removed as counselor for the Academy. Fortunately though, level and sympathetic heads prevailed and both were able to continue. Anastasia had to endure a setback in her career but she made progress all the same, eventually becoming Assistant Dean of the School of Counseling.

It was another day at the Academy of hearing other people's problems and concerns and listening and doing what she could for them, providing them with avenues of catharsis and methods of dealing. Usually the days felt longer and, since becoming Assistant Dean, her workload grew heavier. Today, however, appeared to fly by and the responsibility light. Anastasia was meeting with an old friend, who also happened to be an old fling, the same fling that nearly got her removed as counselor.

The human/xyrillian hybrid stepped into the Diner. It had been years since she had set foot inside the place. And the last time she had in there was with Mindo. She recalled the exact table she last sat at as well and her feet carried her to the presence of "Mindo," she said. "And if I read your profile right, Commander Mindo." She did not wait for an invite as she started to take a seat across the table from him.

Mindo shook his head. "News travels fast," he said. "My reenlistment went through yesterday." He sat back and smiled. "It's good to be back on Earth, and it's really good to see you."

It was not the news that travelled fast, in fact. Since Anastasia had a particular interest in the Pandora, her actively looking into the crew manifest clued her in on his promotion. In fact, much in the way of the Pandora was being kept quiet for the most part. Not that it was classified, but some digging had to be done to get that information. "Yes," she said, "once I heard from you, I looked up your profile, dove a little into your service record. Impressive," she said, "though a bit unnerving as well. But I suppose that is expected from time to time aboard a starship." She shook her head. "Not sure I could ever head out on one of those. I've finally worked myself up to being that Assistant Dean in the School of Counseling," though she could have been dean by now if she had not slept with one of her patients. "And it is good to see you too. How have you been keeping?"

"Well, I suppose," Mindo said. "I don't know how much you know of the Pithos disaster, but I can say the result was the last straw for me and Starfleet. The Pandora did a lot for the Expanse, and I felt like maintaining a Federation presence there was very important. Starfleet turned the matter into a circus, with the Pandora in the center of it all, and in the end the Expanse is no better off than when we left. People died to save us. They believed we were going to make a difference there. After all of that, I couldn't go back. So I've spent the last three years on Risa as a... well, an entertainer."

Stazy smiled at that. "An entertainer. Yes, that sounds like Mindo." She sat back and looked briefly at the menu. "I do not know much of the Expanse. Just what shows up on the Federation News Network." Looking back at Mindo. "It seems something has brought you back into the fold." She had a guess, but did not want to vocalize it. "As long as it brings you happiness and a sense of accomplishment. That is what matters."

Just then, the waiter came and took their orders. Mindo decided not to get the hashbrowns. While Stazy ordered the standard English Breakfast with lots of added hot sauce, with the hotter being all the better.

"To be honest," Mindo said, getting back to the conversation, "I'm not totally sure why I'm back. At first, I thought it was my loyalty to the Pandora and her crew. I admit, someone else taking care of that core doesn't sit right with me. But then there was more. Our ship is missing, as is our Captain, and there's a strange man, possibly a Q, teasing us all. He acts like he has all the answers, but somehow I think we are merely pawns in something much larger. Then there's an old flame of mine, from the USS Tornado, who's a new member of our crew. Our relationship ended abruptly when I was transferred to the Pandora. We never got to say..."

Mindo stopped short of "goodbye and I'm sorry." He remembered who he was talking to. He tried to think of the right thing to say next, but he had already trailed off.

Stazy knew exactly what he was thinking and of whom he was thinking. She had flexed her brow as he spoke and caught herself doing so, hoping she did not give away her tell that she had already known. "Sounds like there is a slew of unfinished business," she said, not wanting to let the silence of his trailed-off words hang like a noose for him to further deal with. "And an unstable element, this Q-ish fellow so to speak, trying to throw a wrench into the works but going just shy of actually throwing the proverbial wrench." She did not wait for a confirmation. "What were my words to you those years ago during our sessions? It was a phrase I repeated frequently. 'Control what you can. What you cannot control, wait until you can or at least have influence.' This goes also for what you can deal with and sort out now. If you have words for Car...a cared for individual, say them. You have a ship to find. Go find it. Then you are fully equipped to deal with any unstable elements."

"Unstable..." Mindo said, hearing the word a little differently than maybe intended. "We had a brief encounter, three months ago, at the gathering on Risa. She looked unstable... as if she struggled to hold herself together. I think the encounter was awkward for both of us." He shook his head, trying to dismiss the thought.

"Awkward is not necessarily a bad thing," Stazy said. "The encounter happened and things progressed I take it. I need to ask you this and you there's no need for you to answer. Just keep these questions for thought, now and in the future. Could the encounter have gone worse? How much worse? On a scale of 0-10, where 0 is little progress and 10 is utter catastrophe, how would you rate the encounter? If you rate it within the range of 0-3 then I say that encounter was a success, as awkward as it may have been for all."

Anastasia could tell Mindo had thoughts and emotions stewing. She sought to bring that simmer down a few degrees. "And if you want awkward, you know how Xyrillians reproduce. And you, of course, know that I am a human/Xyrillian hybrid. Can you imagine my husband and I having twins with me pregnant, as a human would be, with one and my husband pregnant, as a Xyrillian surrogate would be, with our other child?" She let thgouh image ferment in his head a short second. "That proved awkward to both of our families." She finished with a smile as she remembered.

Mindo smiled, grateful for a switch in topic. "It makes me glad that Fesarians can only reproduce with other Fesarians. As you are well aware, I find Xyrillian women very sexy."

"I am sure it has nothing to do with the electromagnetic discharge when we touch," she said in a playful voice. "But I know you are well aware that I am..." and her words paused briefly as she sought what to say, "...I was...something on the wild side," she said matter of factly. The past years had brought about changes in her thus producing the person that sat before Mindo now. And she could see it in his eyes too, that the years had changed him as well. Though he still held remnants of his old self, this was a changed Mindo, perhaps a better Mindo.

"The past few years have mellowed me out," she continued. "I have a family now, and my career. I published a work not long ago. I left it open-ended so that I can add to it, but it is a guide to providing counseling services to people of different races. I mean, you would not counsel a Vulcan with the same methods you would a Klingon, right? In it, I detailed proven methods for many races within the Federation and some without. Romulan, Bajoran, Cardassian, Cha...um...I mean...Chameloid. Some styles do overlap. Many do not however. If you have a counselor on your team, you should have them look at it." And knowing of Mindo's past relationship, she added, "look over it yourself even. Just to let me know what you think."

"I will," Mindo said. "I am very intrigued." For a moment, Mindo hesitated before asking the most obvious next question. "I hate being predictable, but what did you say about Fesarians?"

That made her smile a big smile as that chapter came to mind. "Well Feserians are a unique bunch. They tend to need a bit of...banter. They like to be playfully argumentive at times and generally do require at least, and seldom less than, 8 ounces of an acholic beverage before they can effectively open up to lengthy discussion and/or be receptive to counseling techniques. Tranya is the go-to beverage of choice for most Feserians. Male and female Feserians alike do tend to be on the touchy side. And, by that, I mean they like to touch. They appear to many to be intimate and open to...um...activities that most would deem more intimate than usual. You see, Mindo, you are not my first Feserian, but our sessions hit me as something of a culture shock as well as a grand learning experience. The counselor needs to remain vigilant and well read into the reason for the individual Feserian's visit. Hang on to the little details, because those could be the biggest tells a counselor could hope for." She ended her small counseling speech.

"Take you for instance," she continued. "Misbehaving and rude to authority. In fact, you were that way with me at first. I went out on a limb to be rude-ish back to you. And you seemed to respond to that more favorably than I thought you would. That is where I got the banter technique from. And it has worked on other Feserian patients. In fact, other counselors came to me praising the technique."

The waiter returned with their food and placed it out accordingly.

"And then," Stazy continued, pausing just a bit to make sure the waiter was away, "then I fell in love. It was not just a 'thing' for me as I knew it was not a 'thing' for you. It was genuine, though unexpected and not the right place and time come to find out." She paused to find the words. "You had a wild side about you that no one else in my life had and I seemed to show you something you, likewise, had not experienced."

"The experience of being loved," he replied softly, finishing the thought.

"Not just loved," she expanded," but loved by a sole partner; monogamy. Feserians are a polygamous bunch generally. Monogamy is actually a foreign idea to most, but it is becoming somewhat of a practice among them in small pockets of the population." She could see him thinking that over. "Though your culture tells you to be polygamous, you have found some solace and some adventures in being monogamous as well."

"This is true," Mindo said, "but how do you know I've had monogamous relationships since?"

"If something feels just right," she said, "you tend to do it again." Stazy sat straight. "I do not know, to be honest. But I remember how you seemed, to me, when we were together. Of course, life took us apart. There was pain to be had, but happiness like that is something that you will seek again. I feel I may be right in saying that you have also had a polygamous relationship here and there as well. And there is nothing wrong with that. Finding something that just feels right does not mean other things are wrong. Just...there is something right, more right than you can fathom, that is meant just for you." Stazy started working at her food. "Look at you, right now. You were an entertainer on Risa, out of Starfleet, but now back in uniform, looking for your ship and captain. If you did not feel there was something right about this, even if the definition of what right looks like is still a mystery, then you would not be here, back in Starfleet, doing what you are doing. There is something right about all this."

"Nothing's right about this," Mindo said. "I still don't want to be in Starfleet, and I damn sure don't want a promotion. I can't for the life of me shake the feeling that I'm making a terrible mistake. But my friends are insisting this is the right thing to do. So I'm doing it for them, even though it's a lie." He took a bite of French toast and thought as he chewed.

Swallowing, he continued. "Leaving Starfleet and going to work on Risa is the first thing I've done for myself since leaving Fesaria for Starfleet. Everything in between stemmed from orders and led to constant heartbreak. I stayed with it far longer than I should have."

"I cannot believe that 'everything in between stemmed from orders'," she quoted Mindo back to him. "If I was unable to resist you, I am sure there is at least one other out there, 'in between', who also was unable to resist you. You must have had a relationship. OK, it ended in heartbreak, but that does not mean you did nothing for yourself. This undertaking you are on now, I am confident you will find something for yourself in it, even if you do not see or believe it now."

Mindo hesitated, knowing she was right.

"There were two after you," Mindo said. "The first... she was very unique. A Changeling, actually, named Caradan. She was my superior on the Tornado. There was an incredible magnetic force between the two of us. She was unique, and our love was..." His thoughts drifted to the first time they had made love in her natural state. "...also unique."

"I can imagine," she said. "I think."

He continued, "Cara and I were parted under difficult circumstances. Three months ago, she was assigned to the Pandora crew. We are... different now. But I'm confident we'll be fine working together."

Anastasia nodded her agreement.

He smiled again. "The second was a very free-spirited young man named Fick, the Pandora's former helm officer and the best pilot I've ever seen. We had a lot in common, and I think I nearly did fall in love with him. But then a jealous Klingon tried to kill me over him and we had to end it before it could really develop, otherwise I would have ended up as a stain on the floor of the warp core. A year later they got married and the Klingon asked me to be his best man. I still don't like him."

"Not surprising," Stazy said. "Of course not all Klingons are the same, but some, normally those from the region of East Vi'chak do tend to ask the former lovers of their lover to be the best man or otherwise involved in the union celebration. The word they use is 'Qovpatlh!' It means 'insignificant one' and is meant to be more of a dishonorable than honorable appointment. Like this Klingon, in particular, asking you to be the best man at the wedding of he and his spouse, your former lover, could have been an attempt to...rub it in your face...so to speak." Stazy realized that explanation sounded a bit dreary. "If he is from East Vi'chak that is. Otherwise that is probably not the case. Regardless, you were there for your friend. And I am confident you will find similar friendships and connections on the trek before you."

"He kept insisting it was a great honor," Mindo remarked. "Specifically his honor. According to him, the fact that I was still alive meant I defeated him in our fight, so me being his best man would restore his dignity in the matter, and allow us to bury the bat'leth between us. My refusal would be a severe dishonor. In fairness, Klingons aren't really known for being dishonest about such things. That's more of a Romulan or Cardassian trait. In the end, they went off and eloped elsewhere. I've not heard from them since."

"Again, not all Klingons are the same. We mostly see the dominant culture trait of those who have taken to the stars. If you were to visit Qo'noS, extensively visit, you will see they can be as varied as humans on Earth. It is sad to know you have not heard from them since. Do reach out from time to time. When you are out there," she motioned up with her eyes toward the ceiling, sky, stars, "connections need to be maintained. Spend too much time alone, dwelling on those you have lost or no longer make contact with, you will start feeling," and she held up finger after finger as she counted off, "depressed, alone, and very cold. Because those three words describe space exactly." Stazy was not sure when she got into counselor mode. These things came naturally to her. "Make new connections when you can. Maintain what connections you have. Repair connections as you can. Do that," she smiled at him, "and you will survive anything."

"Reminds me of a song Warp Nine often plays," Mindo said. "'Get by with a little help from my friends.'"

Stazy was nodding her approval. "Yes, exactly. I don't know that song though. But, yes. Even the ones you have not heard from or are distant from you, whether that distance is real or emotional. Maintain contact."

"I will," Mindo said. "And I will with you too, I promise."

"I appreciate that," Stazy said with a smile. "And I will try the same with you. Always remember, though, there is no real difference between lightyears and the air of but six feet. But there is always the proverbial door separating you. Someone may be half a quadrant away, someone you have never felt closer to. And someone may be an arm's length away, someone you have never felt more detached from. In either case, that door is yours to keep shut or to open up."

She's really driving this home, Mindo thought. Was she referring to a specific someone? He could think of about a dozen former lovers and a handful of old friends from the Academy or former assignments, but no one of any real significance. Most recently, he'd been doing his best to keep up with his crew.

The only person in his crew with whom he hadn't talked to in a while was Caradan. Mindo had sensed that their reunion was more difficult for her than it was on him. He knew this was directly related to their last mission together, and possibly exacerbated by the last words they had said to each other. She had been captured by Klingons shortly after, and Mindo was unaware of it for a very long time. He could only imagine what happened to her during that time. Mindo's last words to her hurt him more than any regret he'd ever had. The two had apologized, but kept their distance.

So, did Stazy know about he and Cara? Possibly, but how? Then it hit him: Cara might have been a patient. Therapy for rescued Starfleet POW's was mandatory, and Caradan could easily have done it at headquarters. Which meant Stazy was probably one of the counselors assigned to her. Who better to counsel a Changeling than someone literally writing a book on it? If she did review his personal record, she would definitely be aware of who he served with aboard the Tornado.

"You're really driving this home, Stazy," Mindo said, repeating his initial thought. "Is there something you're trying to tell me? Something you can't tell me? About my crew? My mission? I can see you mean well. If there is something specific, I gotta know right now."

"Oh there is plenty I cannot tell you," she said matter-of-factly. Whether it was specific or not, involved him and his crew or not, there were many things she could not tell him. "It gets..." she looked away briefly, not at anything in particular. Simply collecting thoughts. "It gets difficult at times in social situations with me, I have found out. Getting out of counselor mode when in it, which I find it easy to get into that mode, can be difficult. It has actually caused a strain on some friendships of mine. People tired of me 'reading' them and trying to fix things when sometimes they just want to vent and want a listening ear. You know what I mean by that?" Stazy shook her head and smiled. "I do apologize if I seem to lead you on, thinking I know something I may or may not know. You know what?" She waved her hand as though clearing the air. "...no more counselor out of me today. I'm Stazy. Not a counselor, not Dr. Lauda. But Stazy, your old friend. Um..." and she did not know what to say next to get the conversation back to its jovial, social beginnings.

"I'm perfectly fine to talk to a friend instead of a counselor," Mindo said. "In fact, let's play a game together. Just two friends playing a game. It's called Help a Friend..."

To be continued...

OFF